I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
