You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
