oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
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