sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
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