he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
