I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
