remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Randomize