this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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