The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
