please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
You made out with two different species that night
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize
