The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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