ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize
