Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
