I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize