did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
you never un-have a 4some
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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