You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
