Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
