the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Randomize
