I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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