are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
she smelled like a LAN party
It was confusing and full of hummus
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
