I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
