I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
