all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
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