Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize
