i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
