not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
