Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
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