Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
