i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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