Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Randomize
