i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
