my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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