dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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