you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize