Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
