Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
