All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize