she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
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