Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
