she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
third nipple confirmed
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
