Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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