sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
