Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize