I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
