did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Its about making memories worth repressing
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
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