They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
