Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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