Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize