sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
It's never too late to be topless.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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