before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
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