it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Randomize