feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize